Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to be a mother. There was no question
in my mind about it. I had always known it.
However, I have found (like many of you) that maternity in reality is a
lot different from my childhood daydreams. Some days seem like I haven't accomplished much.
I find myself invaded by feelings of
guilt, frustration, confusion, doubts about me and my abilities more often
than what I would like to admit. Some may say that it's normal, that you can't
separate those feelings when you love your children. Maternity comes in one
beautiful package: all the good and the less desirable together. Other days I wish I could take a break, freeze my kids in time and do something
different, but then I think to myself, "what would I do instead?" I
come to the resounding conclusion that there is nothing else I would rather do, please don't get me wrong. I do enjoy a lot being a mother.
I have conscientiously chosen to be a mother. I want to be a mother with all my
soul. But I want to find the better
mother that is in me, somewhere I know she is there. I
understand the important role that I play in my family's life and so I want to
do it to the best of my abilities. Finding
and reading uplifting talks on motherhood regularly seems to help me keep on the right
track, at least for a couple days, hence this blog. So I hope that as I share what I find
inspiring, I internalize those concepts and in
the process we both can improve. So let's more fully commit to better
ourselves. Let's grow together. I want to find more joy and less guilt. I want
to relish and discover all the little hidden treasures in this challenging but
rewarding trail. What do you say?
